IF YOU HAVE FAITH, PRAY, BUT IF YOU DON’T , THEN

APPEAL TO THE HIGHER ORDER OF THE UNIVERSE

Faith can be a touchy subject

but I do not believe it should be.

 

If you believe in God,

however dimmed by lack of practice,

I would suggest you to awaken it.

In so doing you awaken your connection

with greater powers than your own.

Most Faiths have a peaceful and spiritual emphasis
which serves to connect us

with “our neighbour.”

If you do not have Faith,

then no worries;

just ponder on the infinite scale and wonder

of the order of the universe,
on its power to put your own issues in perspective.

 

But reflect too on how
when you grasp a good intent and you promote it,

with passion and in line with your Faith

extraordinarily and coincidentally,

helpful things begin to happen

towards achieving your good intent.

DO THIS TODAY - FOR YOU!

COMMUNE WITH NATURAL BEAUTY!

Being aware of the infinite scale of

natural beauty of our world

is a key part of our sense of our well-being

 

We can find this in hidden places,

a small garden,

a corner of a park,

along a river bank

or beside a lake,

 

Watch the birds and animals – and listen.

 

We can walk past scenes of natural beauty many times

even in our homes or at work.Examples of it can be in pictures hanging on our walls.

 

Commit to yourself to spend moments each day, taking notice of it, savouring it and being thankful for it.

 

Feel that pleasant and energising impact on you as you enjoy it!

IDEA FOR THE DAY

Do it - Today!

Find a precious 15 minutes today, even while commuting, walking to work,
or dealing with family issues at home or at work. Then:-


 Focus on one thing that is not going right for you.

 Think it through, even write it down from all angles.

 Decide what you would like to do about it and what should be done first.

 Do it! – Today!!

Gerry Neale’s Brief Helpful Suggestions : No. 1

On Re-assessing The Impact Of Your Upbringing.

I.Decide which element of your upbringing you want to revisit.

II.Remember to look for understanding not to lay blame

III. Read widely to improve your understanding

IV.If you want a guide on what to read email me on
     gerry.neale@googlemail.com with brief detail on the subject
     troubling you

A Great Principle For Life!

“The Very Best We Can Ever Be Is
Perfectly Imperfect!”

Always Think Well Of Yourself!

Good Luck.

Gerry Neale

Goals or New Year Resolutions They Either Have The Effective Ingredients Or They Don't!

By early March in any year the truth will have dawned about New Resolutions made ten weeks earlier.

They will by now fallen into one of two groups, cognitively speaking.

In the first group there will be some resolutions long since forgotten. They were never made with any real intent or passion. With these, there will be some that are still lingering in the mind, and still intended, but barely embarked upon.

In the second group, are the more effective ones, the ones already achieved of firmly in the mind to achieve.

There are a number of key components to making resolutions and goals, but one is learning how to write them down in graphic form and in the present tense - as if achieved.

Being able to write down effective goals and resolutions is key to achievement. They become vital affirmations to be repeated daily. This is why the ability to write expressively is so important.  Gerry Neale

Is Your New Year's Resolution to Write a Book?

Every New Year's, thousands of aspiring business and self-help authors resolve to make this the year they get their book done. I've heard that 80 percent of people want to write a book-that's a lot of people. But even if that figure is wrong, and, say, 40 percent of people have the goal of writing a book, that's still millions. However, fewer than 300,000 books are published every year in the United States (find more numbers on bookstatistics.com). That means there are a lot of aspiring authors out there who haven't reached their goal.
So if you're one of those folks who want to get the book done in 2010, here are a few thoughts to get you going.
It Will Feel Really Great to Get That Book Done
If you've been thinking about writing a book for a while, then just think of how great it will feel to get it done. Imagine holding a copy in your hand and flipping through the pages. Imagine marketing your book and seeing the orders come in. Keep those images in mind when you write, and use them as a way to stay motivated. And by this time next year, you'll be able to say, "I'm an author," instead of, "I want to write a book."
Authoring a Book Establishes Expertise
One of the best ways to get motivated is to think of the benefits. Along with the personal satisfaction of completing your book, you can leverage it into new and exciting professional opportunities as well. When you write a book, your status as an expert is immediately elevated. Why? Because you wrote the book! This higher level of expertise makes it easier to get booked for speaking engagements, opens up new opportunities for consulting, helps you get more publicity, and as a result of all these, brings in more income.
Write Often
Most people can't write a book in a month or less. Even two months would be really hard. If you can take time away from work and other activities to write your book really fast, then that's great. But most people can't-they have jobs or clients or other things that need to get done. You'll be more likely to get your book done if you devote an hour or so a day on most days to writing. See where you can cut down on other activities, like watching television or checking e-mail or hanging out on Facebook. Make the commitment to write, and then do what you can to make steady progress, even if it's just a page a day. Once you start writing a little every day for a week or so, your writing time will become habitual, and your day won't feel complete without it.
Get Help and Guidance
Especially if you've never written a book before, it will help to have someone there to help you. Save a little money to work with a coach, or join a writing group that will help keep you accountable, motivated, and moving forward. This is a great way to get feedback and work through challenges that come up as you write. And everything is more fun when you do it with someone else.
You Can Write Your Book In 2010!
Not everyone who sets out this New Year to write a book will actually finish it. But if you really want to make it happen, and you're willing to do what it takes to get it done, then I know you'll be one of the few who becomes an author this year!

Melinda Copp helps aspiring self-help, business, and nonfiction authors write and publish books that establish expertise, achieve their goals, and share their message in a compelling way. Visit http://www.writerssherpaprograms.com/writeabook.html for a free copy of her Write Your Book Quick-Start Mini E-course.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Melinda_Copp

Breaking Your Relationship Pattern, Part 4

Finally, after all of the hard work you have done completing your past, here is a way to break your relationship pattern.

Relationship choices are often based on patterns created in our childhood. These patterns are automatic and subliminal. We believe ours is the way relationships ought to be.

There is no problem having a pattern that leads you to loving, satisfying, long-term relationships. However, many people have patterns that cause them nothing but the heartache of unsuccessful relationships.

There is a way out, a way for you to be free of your particular pattern and to be free to make your relationship choices based on what you need and want. The best way is to understand where your relationship pattern comes from. Then you can consciously choose what works for you and what doesn't, what you want to continue and what you want to stop, and how you want your next relationship to be.

Below is a powerful exercise. In doing this exercise, you will discover information about your relationships and yourself. Knowledge of yourself is freedom to choose, freedom to act differently, freedom to have what you want.

Pattern Tracker©

Section 1. Instructions: Answer the following question for all of your significant past relationships. Significant means you had or still have strong feelings about the person. Go backwards in your history, starting with the most recent relationship. Write down your answers.

* What hurtful things did your partner do in your last relationship?
* What hurtful things did your partner do in the relationship before that?
* What about the relationship before that?

Section 2. Instructions: Answer the following questions and write down your answers.

* What hurtful things did your parent of the opposite sex do to his/her partner?
* What hurtful things did your parent of the same sex do to his/her partner?
* What hurtful things did your parent of the opposite sex do to you?
* What hurtful things did your parent of the same sex do to you?

Section 3. Instructions: You will need to refer to your responses from the previous two sections. To make answering the following questions easier, you may want to copy out those responses. Write down your answers.

* What are the similarities between the hurtful behaviors of your parents and your past partners?
* Are the behaviors opposite?

Section 4. Instructions: Answer the following questions, writing down your answers.

* Your parents' relationship with each other and with you is the basis for your relationship pattern. What kinds of pattern were you programmed to have in your intimate relationship?
* Are you repeating your parents' relationship pattern in your own relationships?
* Are you reacting to your parents' relationship by doing the opposite of their pattern?

Example: (Names and details changed to preserve privacy)

When my client Sonya did this exercise, she filled out Section 1 by listing all three of her significant relationship partners as unavailable and uninterested. Her most recent partner, Jeff, lives in New York, while she lives in Boston. He was barely making time for her. They were only seeing each other once a month and even then he would find reasons to be away from her. He was very argumentative and would never be the one to say he was sorry.

Her previous partner, Ronald, simply did not want to continue in their relationship. Every time something would go wrong, he would back away a little bit more until there was no longer a relationship. Sonya wrote down that Ronald was unavailable because he was unable to be emotionally close. He was also uninterested -- he did eventually walk away from the relationship. This man was not argumentative, instead avoiding arguments at all cost.

Sonya's very first significant partner, Rob, was the love of her life. They loved each other deeply, but even that did not keep them together or prevent him from doing hurtful things. As the relationship progressed he started to withdraw more and more. Eventually he lost interest in her physically. They tried to work it out, but he would shy away from confrontation and nothing ever got resolved.

Here is Sonya's Section 1:

* Jeff was unavailable, uninterested and argumentative.
* Ronald was unavailable and uninterested, and avoided confrontation.
* Rob was withdrawn, uninterested, and avoided confrontation.

Sonya had to think hard about Section 2. She did not want to blame her parents or make them look bad. But as she thought about their relationship with each other and with her, she began to see some patterns.

She remembered her parents arguing often. Her mother felt the father did not care, did not want her, and did not participate in the relationship or the family. Sonya also remembered that her mother was the one who started these arguments and did the yelling, while her father first listened and then walked away.

Sonya's father did not spend much time with her, but was a good financial support. When her father eventually left, he did not stay in touch. Her mother told her over and over how all men eventually lose interest and leave.

Here is what Sonya wrote for section 2:

* Father unavailable, uninterested and avoided confrontation.
* Mother argumentative and blaming.
* Father not around for me, not wanting me, leaving eventually.
* Mother told me all men lose interest and leave.

When it came to Section 3, Sonya copied out the responses from the previous sections. She came up with the following list:

* Jeff was unavailable, uninterested and argumentative.
* Ronald was unavailable and uninterested, and avoided confrontation.
* Rob was withdrawn, uninterested, and avoided confrontation.
* Father unavailable, uninterested and avoided confrontation.
* Mother argumentative and blaming.
* Father not around for me, not wanting me, leaving eventually.
* Mother told me all men lose interest and leave.

In answering the question, "What are the similarities between the hurtful behaviors of your parents and your past partners?" she noticed many similarities. For example, she noticed that all of the men, with whom she has had a significant relationship, ended up treating her the way her father treated both her and her mother. Sonya also noticed with a gasp that all of her relationships have fulfilled her mother's prophecy.

In answering the question, "Are the behaviors opposite?", she noticed that Jeff, her most recent relationship partner, was argumentative. In this way he was the opposite of her father and more like her mother.

Here is Sonya's Section 3:

* Father unavailable to me and mother; I find men who are not available.
* Father was uninterested in mother and me; I find men who lose interest in me.
* Father avoided confrontation; two of the three relationships were with men who avoid confrontation.
* Father left; I attract men who eventually leave. And mother told me they would.
* A man who is argumentative is the opposite of my father, but just like my mother.

Finally, Sonya came to Section 4. What kind of a relationship pattern was she programmed for? The answered seemed obvious: exactly the kind of pattern she has been living out, where the men with whom she's in a relationship become unavailable, lose interest and eventually leave. She is programmed to have relationships that are domed to fail because she is with partners who cannot work through the relationship for fear of confrontation.

She had to answer "yes" when asked if she was repeating her parents' relationship pattern in her own relationships. She also had to answer "yes" when asked whether she was doing the opposite of her parents. And she realized that doing the opposite got her the same exact result.

Here is Sonya's Section 4:

* I was programmed to have a relationship pattern where my partner will become unavailable, losing interest in me and eventually leaving.
* I am exactly repeating the pattern in my parents' relationship.
* Sometimes I have done the opposite of my parents' relationship, but got exactly the same result.

If you do the exercise yourself, I'm certain you'll have some great realizations, perhaps even a sense of relief. You will better understand why you attract and are attracted to certain kinds of partners. You will understand your relationship pattern. And in understanding your pattern, you will be able to break it and break free.

Your Relationship Coach,

Rinatta Paries

www.WhatItTakes.com

About The Author

(c) Rinatta Paries, 1998-2002. Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"

help@whatittakes.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rinatta_Paries

Rinatta Paries - EzineArticles Expert Author

Breaking Your Relationship Pattern, Part 3

Do you want to put to rest the people and situations from your past so they do not interfere with your current and future relationships?

I bet you said yes. Who doesn't have something in their past they want to put to rest? Then let's talk about what action steps you can take to create the absence of past -- or completion -- in your life.

Below are a series of action steps. You'll want to pick a few and repeat them until you are complete with various people and circumstances from your past.

The time it takes to get to genuine completion will vary from person to person and situation to situation. For some it can come quickly. But sometimes completion happens over time: we may have to forgive, let go, or communicate to people in stages over a period of time.

Here are 10 action steps to put to rest the people and situations from your past. Use these action steps on the list of incompletions you created from last week's article.

1. Write Letters

Write letters to the person or people to whom you feel resentful, hurt, or still attached. Freely say everything you want to say and write as many letters as necessary to feel complete, each time going deeper inside to express your full emotions. Do not send these letters, but instead do something with them that leads you to feel you are getting rid of the feelings. Flush the letters down the toilet, burn them, bury them, etc.

2. Tell Your Story

Tell your story over and over to a trusted friend, advisor, or your journal. Make sure neither you nor the person listening edit or judge what you say or write, give advice, or make comments to dispute your feelings. Your job is to communicate and be listened to attentively.

3. Talk to the Right Person

Talk to the person with whom you have the incompletion. Do this only if you are sure the person will be able to listen to you in the same way as in Step 2 above. If you do have this conversation, make sure not to blame or be rude, but talk about your feelings and the consequences in your life. If you have the opportunity, have as many conversations as you need to get complete.

4. Imagine Talking to the Right Person

If the conversation in Step 3 above is not feasible, have this conversation in your imagination. Give the conversation as much time and undivided attention as you would give a real conversation. This works best as a closed eye meditation/visualization.

5. Role Play

Ask a trusted friend to role-play the incomplete situation with you or imagine being back in the situation. Use this opportunity to say what you wish you had said. Repeat the role play again, but this time have the other person act in a way that would have avoided causing the incompletion. Repeat the process over time until you feel complete.

6. Reexamine

Reexamine the situation from the vantage point of the present. How did you grow as a result? Was there a hidden gift in going through the experience? What did you learn from the situation? Repeat until you can feel gratitude toward the situation and the other person.

7. Own What Happened

Take responsibility for it and figure out how to prevent a similar situation from happening again. Answer the following questions at length in your journal: How did you contribute to the situation, specifically? What motivated you? What did you ignore or not communicate? How will you respond differently next time at each of the key junctures?

8. Create Completion by Understanding

Look at the other person's motivations. You do not have to approve or agree. Simply understand. Answer the following questions at length in your journal: What made his/her actions inevitable? Did he/she have a true choice? What would have had to be different in order for his/her actions to be different?

9. Repair the Damage or Loss

Actively repair the damage or loss. If something of yours was taken, replace it with an item just as good or better. If you were emotionally hurt, give yourself the kind of support, acknowledgement, and love you wanted from the other person. Ask trusted others to provide you with the emotional support you needed and did not get.

10. Talk to the Spirit of the Person

Sometimes our relationships go so wrong and so much hurt is created that it is difficult to imagine the person giving us the understanding we need to get complete. In these cases, imagine having a conversation with the person's spirit, attentively listening while you say everything you need to say. Even when the person may not be able to hear you, their spirit always will. Repeat this process until you are complete.

These steps will help you put your past to rest. You will be ready to start working on attracting your ideal Mr. or Ms. Right -- figuring out and then breaking your relationship pattern.

Your Relationship Coach,

Rinatta Paries

www.WhatItTakes.com

About The Author

Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit http://www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"

help@whatittakes.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rinatta_Paries

Rinatta Paries - EzineArticles Expert Author

Breaking Your Relationship Pattern, Part 2 By Rinatta Paries ...

The first step toward being able to attract and create your ideal relationship is to clear the way for it by eliminating baggage from your past. This baggage refers to any resentments, hurts, or fears you have toward anyone who either was a role model or who participated directly in a relationship with you.

Lots of people carry such baggage for a long time, some even for a lifetime. The sooner you can truly let go of this baggage, the less likely you are to recreate bad situations in current and future relationships.

Dropping this baggage is what I call "getting complete."

How do you get complete? Completion is not a sense or an emotion or even a state of being, but a process. This means there are steps and practical actions that will get you to completion. What stands between you and having a great relationship is acting on these steps.

At the most basic level, completion is an exercise in communication. Imagine you could finally say everything you needed to say to everyone you needed to say it to, no holds barred. Wouldn't that give you a great sense of relief and freedom? In essence, getting complete is getting to communicate everything to everyone, without spending your life looking for everyone from your past or having to deal with less-than-receptive people.

Once you are complete with a situation, the next time you face a similar situation you will be free to choose your actions rather than being run by fear, pain, anger, etc. You may flash back to the old situation, but you will not react based on it. You will no longer have anything but a minute negative emotional response when looking back on hurtful situations. For the majority of the time, you will feel genuine forgiveness toward others and yourself.

The first thing you need to do to get complete is to feel all of your feelings, no matter how unpleasant they may be. How do you feel about your past relationships? Have you swept your feelings under the rug? Are you still secretly pining for someone? What are you afraid of in regards to relationships? Who are you still angry with?

In order to allow yourself to feel, you have to know that feelings, unless they are of the clinical depression or the criminal rage kind, will not kill or hurt you. Most people have either not had the permission or never slowed down enough to feel their feelings. You must give yourself both the time and the permission if any completion is to take place. As long as you don't let yourself feel, you will recreate exactly what you had in the past. If you want something different -- a fulfilling relationship -- you can't afford to recreate the past.

Right now, check in with your feelings and make a list of all the people and situations you need to complete. We will come back to this list.

The second thing you need to do to get complete is to take action. Look for a list of ten action steps in next week's newsletter.

Your Relationship Coach,

Rinatta Paries

www.WhatItTakes.com

About The Author

Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit http://www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"

help@whatittakes.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rinatta_Paries

Rinatta Paries - EzineArticles Expert Author
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Writing Therapy Can Make You Feel Better And Make Money

Even as a novice, writing therapy can be as effective as counselling, particularly if you are stressed greatly or if you are trying to come to terms with serious loss or trauma. The very act of getting your thoughts out of your head onto a computer or down on paper is beneficial psychologically. It is almost as if it triggers some form of writing psychology at work going on within us.

It can be difficult to start with if you have not tried creative writing before. You may feel the intensity of emotion in your heart but seem to be unable to codify in your mind as to how to embark on the first sentence, let alone the first paragraph!

Fear not! With a piece of paper turned on its side, in landscape mode not portrait, start writing single thoughts anywhere on the paper and then drawing a circle round each of them. Go on doing the same as more thoughts seem to be freed up and register in your mind.

No matter that you have had no writing training. As subjects or issues occur to you, unrelated one to another or not, just scribble them down in abbreviated form. Don’t even entertain the eventual writing treatment you might give them. Just stay with your brainstorm to get all these disjointed thoughts out onto the page.

Once the cascade of thoughts and ideas has abated, you will have a form of mindmap in front of you, representing the sum total of your current mindset on your problem. Your first conclusion may be that you now face an impossible task to link all the points together!

Don’t despair! Take a brief break then look over your circled points for key aspects or issues within your overall problem. Draw a circle in the middle of two, three or even four sheets of paper and insert one of your key issues in a circle in the centre of each clean page.

Now revisit your mindmap for each page issue in turn. Look for any points that relate, and transfer them to one of your new issue pages. Write them in a new circle on the appropriate page, then linking them with a line drawn to the central circle.

This sifting process will help you enormously to collate your thoughts. With your three or four new issue sheets you can then focus in more depth on each. More thoughts will come on each. Believe or not, you will soon find that you have more than enough to write about.

Then, using your notes, quite simply write and write and write. Don’t worry at this stage about spelling or punctuation just get it down.

Soon you will find that a writing rhythm develops. Persevere and your ability and style will improve quickly. Once your flow of writing has slowed to a stop, go back over it to punctuate it and correct the spelling.

Then you will have the opportunity to think of committing your issue or drama to a non-fiction article or even a book. You can contemplate writing articles for magazines and newspapers or the internet, profiting by the process. There are a number of very good, and reasonably, priced writing tutorial programmes you can download or have mailed.

You have the chance to gain huge therapeutic advantage by writing down your innermost fears and anxieties, making you feel a sense of release. At the same time you can contemplate being able to profit from your growing literary skills.

Good luck and remember persistence pays off.

Breaking Your Relationship Pattern, Part 1 By Rinatta Paries

When you were little, you looked up to your parents. You imitated their mannerisms, words, and actions as you learned about life by watching them. This applies to relationships as well - you leaned about relationships by watching them.
Not all you learned about relationships came from your parents; your learning has continued throughout your life. But what you saw your parents do in relationships, how you interpreted what you saw, and how you felt about it, is the foundation of your adult relationships.
That's not to say that your parents were wrong or bad parents, or even that they had a bad relationship. The only thing that can be said is if intimate relationships are problematic for you, the source is inevitably your foundational learning.
If a great relationship, a great partner, is what you are after, you must see, understand, and deconstruct your foundational learning about relationships. To take apart a foundation of something is a delicate thing. Imagine trying to remove or change the foundation of a house while leaving the rest of the house standing intact. Not an easy task. But in order to have a great relationship, you need to reconstruct your foundational learning while leaving you intact.
To begin, you must get complete with your parents. If you still have negative feelings about what they did to you or each other, you will create situations in your intimate relationships where you will confront these same negative feelings. To see an illustration of this in you own life, take the PatternTrackerTM Quiz at http://www.whatittakes.com/Quiz2/patterntracker.html.
To be complete with your parents means to be both free of negative feelings and to feel compassion toward them. Can you say both are true for you?
If you can, congratulations. You are a member of a very small minority. If you are not free of negative feeling toward your parents or/and if you do not feel compassion for them, you have some completion work to do. That is if you want a long-term, healthy, thriving relationship.
The question is, how do you get complete?
The first thing to know about completion is that it is not just a feeling that will one day appear. There are steps that can be taken to generate a feeling of completion. What stands between you and having a great relationship is taking these steps. Watch for these steps in my newsletter over the next few weeks.
Your Relationship Coach,
Rinatta Paries
www.WhatItTakes.com

About The Author Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit http://www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!" help@whatittakes.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rinatta_Paries

A

Trying As AdultsTo Square The Circles We Constructed In Our Childhood Can Often Be Achieved When We Share Issues With Strangers

In Childhood we can so easily encircle ourselves with defensive patterning to protect us from emotional hurt. So often our immaturity at the time meant that the defences we built were not going to be particularly effective for long term use. Nevertheless, we could have kept them intact and a total secret as we went on trying to make them more effective. All too easily we could have perpetuated this as we lived on through our teens into our twenties, thirties and beyond.

Outwardly such limited evidence of those childhood patterns we disclose inadvertently to those close to us, causes them to judge us as a person by those very patterns. Yet they can have no worthwhile role to play in our adult lives. Whether we are aware of this or not, we can at best become utterly determined not to share with our partners or family, the events which caused us to encircle ourselves with an emotional shield. At worst we would not necessarily admit even to ourselves the intensity of our secret feelings felt since our childhood, or even that we remembered them clearly.

So what can happen when at last we begin to realise, sometimes after 40, 50 or even sixty years, that these circles of defence are no longer valid, no longer represent our own personal view of 'us' and are no longer welcome within ourselves. Yet we find it difficult if not impossible to share it at home.

So we share it either with a complete stranger who is a cognitive counseller, and there many good ones, or with someone we have not met either on- or off-line. Unable previously to want even to recall or discuss these secret feelings with our family, somehow we then can share them with someone previously unknown to us. Also we can find that the impact this has on them is such that they can share past unconfided features of their lives.

The psychology involved can of course be professionally monitored by a qualified counsellor, yet the emotional release achievable between strangers can be as profound even if there was no professional guidance.

I would be very interested in any similar experience you may have had, if you feel able to share this with me, as I am researching this.

The Secret Appeal of Blogs - Why Blogs by Strangers Who Are"Just Like You" Are Irresistibly Magnetic By William Corey

Since their inception, blogs have evolved. There are still blogs used to record the personal details of the life experiences of the blogger but now there are specialized, informational blogs that discuss favorite hobbies, like knitting, rock collecting, aquariums, pets, sports, cooking, candy, electronic gadgetry, toys, art, paranormal experiences and just about anything else that you can think of in which people are interested or in which they have some expertise.
Businesses have discovered the value of blogs too. Many well-known companies have their own blogs which they use to share the day to day details of the "behind-the-scenes" activities in the company. Sometimes, the blogger might be a product engineer or a technician. Sometimes the CEO of the company will weigh-in on the latest burning issues in the company. What businesses have realized is that customer/blog-readers like to know the truth about what is really going on. They want the "Real Story." Many businesses have learned that it can enhance the company image if they are able to present a persona that conveys the sense that: "Hey, we're ordinary folks, trying to solve problems and make a living; just like you."
Of course, there are still the personal blogs by ordinary people, of whom it must be said, emboldened by a false sense of anonymity, write their private details in a blog for all the world to read. These blogs are still wildly popular with blog-readers, probably because people like to know about what other people are up to. We are naturally curious creatures.
Not everyone, however, is eagerly awaiting the next installment of "What My Crazy neighbor is Doing Now," or "Gemma's Dilemmas." When seeking answers to my questions, I frequently try to get a consensus of opinion from people around me. When, during one of my local, infamous surveys I asked an exhausted Mother of a toddler if she ever read blogs, I received a peevish and curt response: "Why do I want to waste my time reading about someone I don't know? I am too busy. I don't care what they are eating, or reading or what their cat is doing. Anyway, that's boring."
Many people may feel this way, but I do not think it is the prevailing view. The fact is, blogs are still with us and are as popular as ever. Evidence? Search for blog directories and you will find them everywhere on the Web.
Blogs exert a magnetic appeal akin to the appeal of soap-operas and reality shows. Blogs, especially, the personal blogs of ordinary people, "just like you" give us a window through which we can peer (with their permission) into their lives. We can, thus, share their hopes, dreams, disappointments, frustrations, joys and the full range of human emotions that make us feel alive. Like the Talosians in Episode One of the original Star Trek series,( "The Menagerie") we are fascinated by how others live and we want to know how they feel. By observing others at a safe distance so we do not actually become entangled in their complicated lives, we can feel certain self-assurance about our own lives that we are indeed, OK. The examination of other people's lives can provide us with entertainment; we can find wisdom and sometimes, inspiration. We can learn about ourselves; how we are different from others; how we are the same. We can often identify with the blogger. Maybe this helps us feel less alone in a world where, when we look out our window, our neighbor, whom we do not talk to and who does not talk to us, is not home again, as usual. We can always find comfort knowing that we can still enjoy human contact and have some connection, if only a meeting of minds, through the window of our computer. This is, essentially, the Secret Appeal of Blogs.
W.E. Corey

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